Being a housewife and a mother is the biggest job in the world, but if it doesn’t interest you, don’t do it – I would have made a terrible mother. – Katharine Hepburn
Can you have it all? That’s the question I put forward today. Can women in society have a job, a career and a family? In society women have very much moved away from the housewife role, we have taken to the board rooms, marched into the job center’s and laid claim to jobs that men would have previously been given. Now that women are beginning to lay claim to jobs previously scarce to them what becomes of the housewife? Can we as women really as they saying goes:
“Have our cake and eat it”
Is having a successful career really achievable when you want to start a family. Does something have to give for you to have a successful family unit? Having a family is no small decision and it requires all your time and energy. Starting a family and managing it is a life long commitment, children are hard work and they take up every aspect of your life and demand constant attention until they reach the age where they can spread their wings which nowadays is getting later and later. Many people’s children don’t leave home still their 21 due to the way the economic climate is, so having a family is a big deal and to embark on this journey as a woman your faced with the idea; should you give up your career aspirations to be a stay at home mum? It’s a question that is still relevant today as it was 60 years ago. It’s a question that even today women struggle with and no matter how far we have come in ways of thinking and our attitudes women still do give up good career’s to be stay at home mums. We may think that this is a small majority of people but in my experience if people have the money the women will generally give up theirs career’s to look after the kids.
So if everyone had the option and the money, would you give up work to be at home with your kids? Would you don an apron and get the dusters out and make your job one that is very much within the home? Be honest, would you?
In today’s society men and women try to have it all! The job, the career, the social life and the family but in reality how easy is this to maintain when there are only so few hours in the day and so few days in the week when you have a multitude of things to cram in. Working life sucks up so much of our time that some days I barely have time to make it home and eat dinner before I have to be back in bed to get up to start the day again, add socializing with my friends, spending time with the boyfriend and keeping my house in a bearable state where I don’t cry every time I open the door I rarely have a moment’s peace. To think one-day I will add kids to the mix of my day it makes me shrink in fear, how will I cope and how the hell did my mother manage four of us! The idea that my only spare moments one-day will be taken up by kids who will demand and want and cry and moan and make a mess makes me wonder how I will cope with a job and maintain screaming brats all at the same time. Is having kids a career choice in itself? By having children are we in hindsight choosing a career of mother hood where dirty nappies and the needs of others will be our number one priority! Is motherhood a career that just has no pay cheque?
To have it all would be the dream but is it reality? In reality something has to give when you have kids, many things have to give and to be the best parent you can be is being a housewife really not such an old-fashioned idea but one that has been over looked and pushed aside by feminists and equal rights. In reality is being an au-pair basically being a housewife. Maybe nanny’s and au-pair’s should change their job titles to housewife, as in reality when you hire one of these you are hiring them to do your job.
Now I am not stone age and I am fully aware men can give up their jobs too and I fully advocate this if the man is capable of managing a household, though in my eyes it has to be seen as currently my partner cannot navigate his way to the washing machine let alone look after a child. I fear if my partner was left with children he would fumble around cluelessly as in 4 years together he hasn’t once put a wash on without menacing verbal instruction, hasn’t once changed the bed sheets as in his eyes the magic fairy must do it. He hasn’t vacuumed without direction or even washed up without being verbally abused too, so to leave a child in his hands would only be abuse. So until I can see men organizing a house as well as we women seem to be programmed to do I am still very much on the front of, housewife not house husband.
So to answer the question that so many so tirelessly try to achieve, can we have it all? I answer you this….No! I am not saying you will forever live a half fulfilled life but be realistic and know what type of life will make you happy because having it all is an unrealistic reality people strive to get that only lets them down when they cannot reach it. Even the rich and famous cannot have it all so sit back and decide, what type life do you want? Is that a family or is it a life endlessly about you? Choose what reality you want and then just live it.